Thrive with Rest and Reflection

[00:00:00] Aicila: Welcome to business. As unusual today, we're diving into the uncharted territory of rest and self-awareness with our guest, Jessica Adams, the founder of discover yellow.

[00:00:11] Aicila: We uncover why rest is crucial, not just for survival, but for thriving in both personal and professional realms. We'll explore practical strategies to integrate self care into your busy life and redefine success with meaningful impact. Stay tuned for insights that can transform how you work and live. "

[00:00:31] Aicila: Today I am speaking with Jessica Adams of Discovery Yellow. Welcome to the show, Jessica.

[00:00:35] Jessica: you, thank you so much.

[00:00:38] Aicila: And so Jessica isn't just of Discover Yellow. She founded it. She runs it. And Discover Yellow helps folks find more space in their lives and work.

[00:00:49] Jessica: That is correct.

[00:00:50] Aicila: And one of the things we traded back and forth on possible topics was the importance of self awareness and becoming aware. And are you would you be [00:01:00] willing to share, like, a personal anecdote or a case study to sort of illustrate that, what makes self awareness important or becoming aware of yourself or aware in general?

[00:01:09] Aicila: Mm

[00:01:09] Jessica: absolutely. So I, I really have looked through the lens of self awareness being the foundation of so much of what we have to learn and the ability to allow us to grow. So oftentimes what I kind of say to myself, but also in conversations with others is if we don't know, it's hard to grow. Not that we can't grow, but I think oftentimes if we're not aware, if we don't have a greater, great enough sense of self awareness, maybe about why something matters to us, maybe about why something doesn't matter to us, greater sense of self awareness around our values, what we want to be intentional about what's real for us in a season of life.

[00:01:45] Jessica: What emotions am I feeling? All of these elements without a natural curiosity and learning more about ourselves, we honestly may be heading in a direction that one isn't ours to head into. I mean, think about this world we live in, right? We are so saturated [00:02:00] with influences at any given turn. And. The art of comparison can come in the wanting to kind of, you know, do something because someone else might be doing it to be influenced in certain ways that I need to buy this.

[00:02:13] Jessica: I need to try this. They might all be great things, but without having a greater sense of self awareness, they might not be the things that we need to be chasing after. And I think that's where things from a leader perspective, just a human perspective. We can run ourselves in a place of getting closer to depletion, closer to burnout.

[00:02:31] Jessica: And a lot of that can come from a place of we are running someone else's race. So,

[00:02:35] Aicila: Yeah. Is there, can you share a story that illustrates that?

[00:02:40] Jessica: In terms of my own self awareness,

[00:02:43] Aicila: Yours, or somebody you worked with?

[00:02:44] Jessica: Yeah, yeah. So so when I think about self awareness and I'll speak personally, but having done workshops and retreats and, and team exercises and things, there are a lot of similarities. When I talk about having a greater sense of self awareness to [00:03:00] recognize the moments in and throughout my every day, that I have the opportunity to use time as a gift Something that I can invest in versus something that's just spoken for me.

[00:03:11] Jessica: And so that is really kind of the, the opportunity to create margin. It's, it's that space maybe in between transitions. And so what that looks like is a lot of times at workshops and retreats it looks like unpacking some, some questions, right? Some thinking about. Now, if I look at my general flow of my day, where might I have opportunity to take a bit of a pause to recognize in that day of maybe transitioning from one activity to another?

[00:03:39] Jessica: What do I need? Right? What is my body telling me that it needs? Maybe it's a bit of movement. Maybe it's some connection, actually. Maybe I need to pick up the phone, send someone a text. Maybe it's some type of knowledge in that point. I want to be consuming something and learning something. Maybe it's a creative outlet.

[00:03:55] Jessica: That can look different for everyone. So for me personally, movement comes at the top, [00:04:00] right? I D I definitely tend to be a person who I enjoy working out. I enjoy moving my body.

[00:04:07] Jessica: I work out usually in a community type environment. So it also allows me a place where I can encourage others. Others are able to encourage me. So what I've realized is that even in, and especially in a busy week, a full day, prioritizing some element of moving my body is very important to me. Now, am I perfect?

[00:04:28] Jessica: No, I'm human, right? Just like everyone that's going to be listening here. But I think the reality is, is having a greater sense of self awareness around what are those points in your day where maybe some margin. It's, you're capable of creating some margin, it's necessary for you to then refuel and repurpose into that next activity, and asking yourself the question, what do I need? So oftentimes what I will tell people is through a series of questions, unpack a little bit. Well, in times when I'm feeling stressed, What are the things [00:05:00] that actually help me lower my shoulders a bit, right? We can often tend to hold some stress here. Maybe in our jaw, right? Is it that I need to breathe a little bit different?

[00:05:09] Jessica: I need to pay attention to how I'm breathing. Is it that I actually need to get up from my desk or move a little bit? Is it that I need to transition from what I'm working on for a bit, maybe set it aside or have a creative brain dump of some sort where I've just gotten myself stuck? Because I think sometimes the story we can tell ourselves is that creating margin in and throughout our day actually is a distraction or keeps us from being productive or getting things done. And I would argue just based on research and things I've read and just personal experience. And, and again, through feedback from others that it's anything but. It actually has the ability to not only refuel, but help us be more productive in a, in a bigger sense.

[00:05:50] Jessica: And sometimes it's even about checking in and recognizing, I don't even know why I said yes to this. I said yes to something in such a cadence or a momentum that I didn't really think about what [00:06:00] my yes or my commitment meant. And now I'm overstretched. So just having those little bits of pause or transition,

[00:06:06] Jessica: but I think where that stems back to in your earlier question is having a greater sense of self awareness around where those moments of pause and margin are necessary for me, and they're different for each of us, and how I can utilize that time to refuel in ways that are meaningful.

[00:06:23] Aicila: I mean, I I totally relate to that. And especially I think I have the sort of get things done in common.

[00:06:30] Aicila: Like I like you said, like I I can thrive. Like I used to do a lot of events. I can really thrive in that. And and learning how to notice. When it went from thriving to draining and, and it is that it's how am I refueling is, am I paying attention to the right things?

[00:06:47] Aicila: Could you give like two or three tips or actionable strategies? Like if, if somebody is hearing this and they're like, Oh yeah, I relate to that. And they need to get to know what those moments are. Can you give them a couple of tips or strategies on how to work that out [00:07:00] for themselves?

[00:07:01] Jessica: so a couple of things come to mind. So what I would say is the first one is the invitation to be curious.

[00:07:05] Jessica: Do I have something to learn from my circumstance right now? The other thing I would say is to allow yourself the opportunity to learn and to know that you can relearn. So what I mean by that is I don't think there's any one size fits all with, again, When the, when the margin needs to happen in and throughout the day, how I use that time to refuel and really refresh in ways that are meaningful.

[00:07:31] Jessica: And I also don't think we are the same person day in and day out, weekend and week out year in and year out, right? We go through these different seasons. Our circumstances change. We are dynamic individuals. And to be honest, I think that's kind of a beautiful thing. If we choose to, to look through a lens of what do I have to learn in this season?

[00:07:50] Aicila: Hmm.

[00:07:50] Jessica: So not being almost so like, I would almost encourage people to not be too rigid. So the questions you might be thinking are, okay if I look at my day, are [00:08:00] there any natural opportunities to create a little margin or a little pause? Sometimes that's taking a hard look at our schedule of what we say is important versus how we're spending our time

[00:08:10] Aicila: hmm.

[00:08:11] Jessica: no judgment there. No shame there at all. But it is a real, it's a real question that I think we owe it to ourselves to ask. And so we don't get to a place. I read one time. The, this woman was talking about how we wouldn't, we wouldn't just jump into a river typically without knowing how deep it is, what's at the bottom, the temperature, where it leads.

[00:08:32] Jessica: And I think the same can be true about the decisions that we're making or what we're just jumping into is asking ourself also, How do I need to chase this choice?

[00:08:42] Jessica: Where might this be taking me? I can tend to be a person who, I'm a helper by nature, right? I want to help and I, I love, I love helping people. I love to make a difference and an impact. And, but I, I do have to be cautious with that chase your [00:09:00] choice, right? Sometimes it is actually better for me to have a purposeful no so that I can make more room for a purposeful yes.

[00:09:08] Jessica: So I would encourage again, in terms of, Thinking about where am I? What season am I in? Do I really have the capacity? Do I have the energy? Do I have the bandwidth to be doing what I've been committing to? And maybe the answer is yes, and sometimes it's even a little more. But maybe the answer is no.

[00:09:27] Jessica: And maybe that for this season right now, that's okay. And that would create a little opportunity for a bit more margin or time for you to refuel in ways that are meaningful for you. So I think the check in, I guess is what I would say at the end of the day is the check in is the opportunity to learn what you choose to do with that,

[00:09:46] Jessica: maybe create an action or two and, and try something. But give yourself grace in the process. Know that you are dynamic, know that you are changing, and just because it doesn't work the first time, or you don't notice, the reality is, is those little deposits, [00:10:00] those buildups over time, they start to shift the way you look at this opportunity for margin to a gift and a gift of time and to use it for purposeful ways. So I really, I would encourage people to think about What does this refuel look like for me?

[00:10:15] Jessica: I actually have a quote that I come back to often, which speaks to kind of a reframe and a question which says, oftentimes we will ask ourself this question, which is have I worked hard enough to deserve rest? And the reframe of that really should be, have I rested enough to do my most loving and meaningful work?

[00:10:38] Aicila: hmm.

[00:10:39] Jessica: And that can be really powerful. I read that once and it has really stuck with me. And. And I encourage people to think about that because I think if we're honest We all deserve rest. It's the way we function best as humans, right? It's the way we were designed, whether rest looks like sleep or connection with people, whether it looks like creative [00:11:00] outlets, or maybe it's a a little bit of a a mental rest, right?

[00:11:04] Jessica: I just need to actually take, take some time to recharge in that way. Rest, rest looks different. There's usually what seven to nine types of rest. I think that people typically talk about, but recognizing that We need to be coming from a place of rest in order to do the work that we're called to do in a loving and meaningful way, and recognizing what that rest looks like for us, and knowing that it has the potential to be different, is, it really is a very powerful tool in the element of self awareness, I think.

[00:11:37] Aicila: no, that is, I love that question.

[00:11:40] Aicila: What advice would you give your 18 year old self?

[00:11:43] Jessica: Oh, that's really good. I'm going to immediately go towards the inner critic side of things.

[00:11:50] Aicila: Ha ha ha!

[00:11:51] Jessica: So, I don't know if you can relate to this, or if anyone who's listening can relate to this, but. I think there is a lot of energy [00:12:00] and attention that can be placed on the narrative that lives inside of our head, often.

[00:12:04] Jessica: And sometimes that's for very constructive things, but oftentimes I think it's maybe not as constructive. So, paying attention to the words that I am choosing to use to myself is something that I wish I had a greater sense of. And maybe not even just a greater sense of, but a greater willingness to acknowledge when they're not serving me well and that I have the ability to choose the words.

[00:12:38] Aicila: Mm

[00:12:39] Jessica: versus letting others dictate that for me. Or, you know, when I think about I think confidence is, it's a muscle we build over time. We don't, we're not either confident or not confident individuals. That's just, that's not the case, right? We have experiences. We have times where maybe someone has said something to us.

[00:12:58] Jessica: We have times where we thought something [00:13:00] was going to go a certain way and it went a different way and maybe not in the direction we wanted. All of these things over time can help build our confidence muscle. Or maybe help break it down.

[00:13:10] Aicila: hmm. Mm

[00:13:11] Jessica: And so when I think back I again, we kind of know what we know in the moment, but I do, I do think about those deposits or that building of that muscle along the way.

[00:13:23] Jessica: And. I wish that if I were back at 18, I would recognize that there's more ownership on my own part for that, that I'm capable of. And I think that's pretty empowering in a lot of ways to say just like we wouldn't walk out and naturally have Big biceps. Naturally, we usually have to work on that muscle and sometimes that's that's painful, right?

[00:13:49] Jessica: We have to lift something that's a little heavier and we have to be in in process of being Consistent with the lifting process and I think that self development is very naturally [00:14:00] related and aligned to that type of analogy there So yeah, when I look back, I think a lot of it is what is that narrative that I'm telling myself?

[00:14:08] Jessica: How is it serving me? You How is it building me up? How is it breaking me down? Is it keeping me stuck? What would I say to someone else? And am I able to say those same things to myself? Cause the reality is I've learned now how much kinder I can be with my words to other people, how much more supportive, encouraging.

[00:14:30] Jessica: Understanding, compassionate than sometimes I am to am to my own self.

[00:14:35] Aicila: Mm hmm.

[00:14:37] Jessica: Can you relate to that

[00:14:39] Aicila: I, I feel like that is a, that is a very, unfortunately a common thing that I think a lot of folks have to learn how to navigate. That's, that would be great. I bet your 18 year old self would really thrive on that.

[00:14:52] Jessica: Yeah.

[00:14:52] Aicila: And I bet a few, a few 18

[00:14:54] Jessica: Yeah, I think so too. I think so too, because I, you know, it's funny, when you asked the question, I had this immediate reaction, which [00:15:00] was maybe more of the kind of candid well, I would do it different, or I wouldn't care as much, or and I think all of that is true, but the reality is, is I, I think we, we could say those things.

[00:15:16] Jessica: But if we're not really understanding, and this is why I use that kind of muscle analogy, if we're not really understanding that it is a process where we, we're, we're continuing to build that, right? We're continuing to make those deposits, continuing to recognize like, you know what, Jessica? You can say that to yourself, but where is it going to lead you?

[00:15:38] Jessica: Is that where you want to go? And I think that's the piece that almost feels so much more empowering. I'm not sure. Like when I look back at 18 year old Jessica, which feels like a long time ago how empowered I really felt in being able to choose words that true and, and were constructive for me in, in the right ways.

[00:15:59] Aicila: Mm [00:16:00] hmm. What's something you're excited about in your business? So either, you know, just something you love doing or a new program or project or an event, just something something you're excited about.

[00:16:12] Jessica: Yeah. Well, I have to say at its core, this is probably a very simple answer, but the first thing that comes to mind is, I, I get excited about this work because it allows me to be very creative, right? There is there is no one size fits all approach to any workshop. I constantly love to I'm reading, I'm listening to things I'm learning from individuals that have been with us in this community.

[00:16:36] Jessica: And I am redesigning workshops that. I believe have the ability to get people thinking, have the ability to learn something, and take something away much beyond our time together. So I think the things that excite me are create, continuing to be able to create these environments where people have the opportunity to learn and grow, and to maybe even choose to do one thing different that allows [00:17:00] them to live life with more intention.

[00:17:02] Jessica: What it looks like In actual execution. I'm excited in 2025 for maybe some collaboration opportunities. I I love hosting retreats and but I know that there are so many other people out there that are doing similar type of work and I am a collaborator, collaborator by nature, but, I have a real desire to maybe align with a couple individuals and maybe think about what some collaboration opportunities could look like all in the opportunity to give people an enhanced experience to keep making these types of of investments even more valuable and whether that be.

[00:17:40] Jessica: Individuals who are also facilitating different type of, of self assessment or sorry, self awareness related workshops or it's individuals who maybe are, you know, certified in some type of movement exercise or breath work or other things like that. I think those are definitely elements that have the ability to to [00:18:00] just enhance the overall Discover Yellow experience.

[00:18:04] Jessica: So yeah, and I'm, and I am honestly, genuinely just excited for whoever. Whoever comes into the community next year, whether it's people who come back, I have some people who have been been to a retreat every year since I started three years ago and they come once a year and it is a great opportunity for them to have that check in.

[00:18:22] Jessica: And sometimes it's for a personal, sometimes professional, they're not necessarily business retreats, but. The questions are open. So someone gets the choice to choose how they want to want to take the question. But I also, I am always of the opinion of whoever is meant to be, there will be there.

[00:18:38] Jessica: I know that I don't believe anything is by chance. And I just get excited for who I will have the opportunity to work with next year and who I have the opportunity to learn from, because that's the other thing is this work. I feel so inspired by it, but I never lose sight of how. inspired I am by every person that I get to learn from.[00:19:00]

[00:19:00] Aicila: Yeah. For folks that are listening, how do they learn more? Follow you, get in touch.

[00:19:07] Jessica: Yeah, great question. So easiest way to find me certainly would be the website. The website's going to definitely offer you all of Discovery Yellow, the journey of how, you know, how it started how to get connected testimonials, retreat experiences, what I'm all about.

[00:19:24] Jessica: I think that's really important if you're choosing to attend this type of workshop or retreat experience. Everybody is not for everybody. And I think it's very important to recognize what you're looking for in your own personal experience. So even on the website, there are some indicators of what you can expect, what a day in the life of a retreat looks like.

[00:19:44] Jessica: And I I've done that on purpose because I really want people to recognize why they would be making this investment. What it really looks like for them. So definitely on the website. Also on social media. So Instagram discover dot yellow and Facebook is just discover yellow. And I would love to [00:20:00] stay connected.

[00:20:00] Jessica: So

[00:20:02] Aicila: Thank you. Thank you for joining us today.

[00:20:04] Jessica: Thank you so much. I appreciate the opportunity.

[00:20:07] Aicila: What a delight to have Jessica here to talk about her own journey and the ways that she's bringing that journey to others. If you can relate to the need for more rest in your life. Take on her challenge to be curious about what you need to build those refueling routines. Remember breast to invest in your best. Next episode, we'll dive into tools from the business as unusual toolbox, helping you disrupt the norm with flare. Thank you for tuning into business. As unusual. Remember in this ever evolving world of modern business, it's not about fitting in. It's about standing out. See you next time, stay curious, stay innovative and always keep it unusual.